Over as soon as it had begun

This month marks the third month of my studies in UniSIM. Almost as soon as it has begun, it is going to end soon sometime next month. So far, none of the classmates that I am with are very prepared with the schedule. Initially, the assignment hand up rate was once per month, but as of now, I have to prepare two assignments in 1 week. I'm going to be so stressed up soon.

Camp stuff has been ok so far, but as the paperwork guy, I realise I have lots of things starting to pile up and I have no means of completing it, blame it on technology that is programmed in a complicated way. The only fear I have is next month, when my unit comes back from the Taiwan exercise.

On the 18th of May, I will sit for my exam for the first time in this course; incidently, after the unit comes back from Taiwan on May Day, there will be loads of paperwork to do and the stress level will hit a high for me. Perhaps things that goes wrong just have to go wrong.

When things aren't worth it

I don't know what to think or say anymore, perhaps after 2 consecutive nights of staying up late has made me come to this decision, that I should not try any harder anymore when it comes to relationships.

I'm already stressed up with paperwork stuff in camp, studies are already very difficult to juggle - I have no reason to make myself suffer more by seeking a relationship that doesn't have any recognition or any reciprocration.

I'll just see how things go from here. Mentally, I'm tired. Physically, I'm bogged down. Combination? I'm just a living dead that has no choice but to carry on living.

My broken wings carry me nowhere
The light I could see before vanish
All that's left is nothing
Feathers stained with blood of my heart.