Troubling....

Its really troubling times.... perhaps....

At my workplace, things are settling down pretty well and I seem to be working alright already (since I have had a dream about the place before too...). However over at the warehouse side, things are starting to become a little more chaotic as the main team that our department is working with is starting to split up. Two of them decided to quit because of the committment they have to put into the job - standby for 24 hours a day, including weekends.

Lets face it, the company has orders from customers and engineers during ungodly hours when most people would be sleeping (mainly because they operate 24 hours and are on shift rotation). The warehouse however does not have shift rotation and only has three people in the team. With two leaving, that means only one experienced staff is left. My original company (where the warehouse is) has hired someone else, but it seems like he is not going to work long term too.

I have some worries about my job though, especially since it is nearing three months (the end of probation). It is not known whether they will confirm me on the spot or will just extend the probation or might not even raise my pay. It is weird, having to consider the many outcomes that will arise from this job.

I'm more or less capable of doing most of the logistics stuff, but the department is really in disarray. There is intense politics in such a small department and the filing system is in a mess. I may not want to help them clear up the stuff, but I do hope that I can change something before the end of my probation. Anything goes from that day on.


*****************************************************


Perhaps I may have spoken too few of words to many people.

Perhaps I could have kept many things unsaid.

However, I still do not like to be labeled as someone who does things at a whim and makes one-sided judgements without much thought. Perhaps its a whip-lash effect that she is having, but there are many things I want to clarify, but find no point to (since we are no longer together).

For one, I had once called my first ex names after I found out two things: one, she cheated my feelings when I was with her, because I was never treated as a bf; two, she shares many things with my current ex and that includes things about me (when I broke up with my current ex the second time). True, I may have been disappointed by things that my first ex has done to me, but by sharing info about me with my current ex that time, is quite uncalled for.

For two, perhaps is because of what I didn't do, my current ex blames me for many things. I don't blame her for blaming, but she doesn't understand that since a long time ago, I have already told her that I do not wish to continue in the relationship. However because of not wanting to hurt her back then, I decided to carry on for a while longer. Yet when I have decided to leave, she held me back - to which I reluctantly continued, to humour her a while longer.

I am troubled because she is a vulnerable lady.